Tending to Your Inner Child
Our Rare Mothers in Relationship Workshop is turning out to be quite wonderful. Each week we gather and share our vulnerable hearts. There is a great deal of wisdom in our circle which is made up of Rare Mothers ranging in age from their 30’s to their 70’s. If you have any inclination to come, please do.
This past week we dove into attachment theory. We will be referring back to it often since it informs how we show up in relationships. One central idea that arose was tending to the inner child or the practice of self-soothing.
As children none of us got everything we needed and so we had to learn to take care of ourselves. We must continue this practice into adulthood so that we can heal. When we don’t tend to our past hurts, they run the show from behind the curtain and may cause havoc in our lives. They are at the root of our reactivity and patterns of defensiveness. The question is: how to tend to your inner child?
Here is a simple practice to tend to your inner child:
Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Imagine a moment in your life where you felt safe secure, warm and held. Maybe you were with your parent, grandparent or your beloved dog. Imagine a moment where you were the recipient of unconditional love.
Perhaps there is an image that comes to mind? Can you feel it in your body? Take a full breath and feel the warmth and love. See yourself smiling or visibly settling. Enter into that moment and bask in its goodness. This is a moment where you were resourced and felt loved.
Now, place a hand on your heart or wrap both arms around yourself and give yourself a big hug. Let the feeling of being held and loved intensify tenfold. Take a deep breath and let it sink in.
You can do this practice each morning and night. In a moment where you feel afraid or challenged, you can wrap your own loving arms around yourself and let the little child inside know she is loved.
Loving and accepting yourself is one of the greatest gifts you can offer yourself.
Coming Up This Week: Acceptance
On Tuesday morning we will explore how acceptance can benefit your relationship when you step back and let your partner be who they are without needing them to change. This gives them space and they will know that they are loved. In reality no one is going to be who you would like them to be all the time so you may as well let them be themselves.
The practice of acceptance begins with accepting yourself. We will explore ways to tame the inner critic and invite the voices that are loving and supportive versus the ones that are critical and making you feel small or unworthy. Does this resonate with you at all? If it does, please come and join our conversation.
Receive Support
We would love to meet you and offer our support to you and your family. This is a precious opportunity to come together with other Rare Mothers in an intimate setting. We meet every Tuesday morning at 10am PST. Drop-in anytime. You are always welcome.
